Long-overdue update

The past few months have been crazy, stressful and exciting. B and I have had plenty of down moments. Her dad passed away on May 10th. He had been in the hospital since before Thanksgiving and his body finally gave out. He was only 63. He had suffered for so long. To say his death was a "blessing" is hard to accept, but his pain went on for so long that we have to believe he's found peace. His death threw the family into chaos for a couple weeks. They're still struggling, but they all can finally move on with their own lives. Obviously, there's a lot more to this story, but this will suffice for now.

In other news, B and I bought a house. FINALLY. We first saw it in February, we closed on June 9th, and we move in July 1st. It's a wonderful old house, built in 1870. It's big (almost 2.000 sq. ft.), but we'll finally be able to have our own offices AND a guest room. Plus, a big eat-in kitchen, a formal dining room, a good-sized living room AND a library. Yes, we are total book nerds and need a separate room for our hundreds and hundreds of books. We've spent two weekends at the house cleaning, painting, ripping up dog-pee-stained carpet, spackling, blah blah blah. We ordered new carpet for the library, purchased some beautiful stone squares to go under the propane stove (decorative/heating NOT a cooking stove!) in the library, and met with a contractor to get an estimate for putting new walls up in the master bedroom. It's going to be costly, I'm afraid. But, we've got to do it. The walls in there now are HORRENDOUS and we really need to start fresh.

Next weekend, B's brothers might come out to help us paint. Plus, we have an appointment for the library floor to be measured for the new carpet and pad. The entire downstairs is painted an off-white color. Believe me, that's gonna change. We already painted a really pretty green in the kitchen. It's a pretty dramatic change already. I'm going to use a deep, rich red in my office. It's called "Tibetan Red" and I found it at Lowe's. I refinished an old (1940s) wood bankers chair that I paid $20 for. It looks wonderful! I want to find a library table or something comparable to use as a desk. I can't wait...

Well, that's my life in a nutshell. A big, confusing, stressful, exciting nutshell.
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    geeky geeky
Jerri Blank

Well, this is appropriate.

Your Blogging Type is Unique and Avant Garde

You're a bit ... unusual. And so is your blog.
You're impulsive, and you'll often post the first thing that pops in your head.
Completely uncensored, you blog tends to shock... even though that's not your intent.
You tend to change your blog often, experimenting with new designs and content.

I'm on my lunch hour. I should get my a** outside and walk. But, no.
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    lazy lazy


Take this quiz at QuizGalaxy.com
Well, this is one way to be positive... I haven't updated in ages. So, here goes. On 9/12, I started my new job. So far, I love it. It's ten times better than my last job. It's challenging, exciting, and better-paying. (MUCH better-paying.) I'm really happy with it, and I feel like I can go somewhere with this job. They offer tuition reimbursement after one year of employment, so you can be damn sure I'm going to take advantage of that. 

My car situation is fine now. I have a 2002 Hyundai Accent, and all is well. I didn't want to finance the whole thing, so I paid half in cash. Which of course drained my house fund. So, I basically have about $80 in my account now. Uh, that's a far cry from where I should be at this point in saving for our house. So, it begins again. What really sucks is that I don't get my first paycheck from the new job til 10/17 (over one month after starting!). It's only because of when I started and the way their payroll period begins/ends. So, it's tight pursestrings for awhile.

 B got hurt last Sunday. She most like tore the ACL in her right knee. She's been home all week and has been hobbling around as best she can. She can't get in to see the ortho doctor until this coming Tuesday. Who knows where it will go from there. She tore the ACL in her left knee about twelve years ago, so she kind of knows what to expect. Unfortunately, her job is kind of screwing her over right now about working from home. She has the ideal job to work from home, but they're being stupid right now about what they'll do for her. I'm just keeping everything crossed that they'll smarten up and help her out in what we hope will be a temporary situation. Anyhoo, poor B has been limping around for a week and taking Lortab for the pain. I guess it helps her sleep. She is SO bored. I'm trying to figure out what we can do today that won't be uncomfortable or painful for her. Scrabble? (Yes, we're actually going to get out the Scrabble game at some point, but I want to find other stuff too.)
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    determined determined
Scary bucktoothed woman

Fairly accurate

Your Inner Child Is Sad

You're a very sensitive soul.
You haven't grown that thick skin that most adults have.
Easily hurt, you tend to retreat to your comfort zone.
You don't let many people in - unless you've trusted them for a long time.
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    groggy groggy
Coffee cup and journal

Saturday rant

This is something that has been bothering me for several months ever since my birthday in April. I've ranted to B about it, but of course it still urks me.

In April, I turned 40. For months leading up to it, I dreaded it. For many reasons. Thanks to B taking me to Montreal for a great birthday trip, it arrived and was actually good. I survived. In a nutshell, 40 is a landmark birthday for most people. Me included.

A few days after my birthday, B and I spent the weekend with my family so they could have a little party for me. My sister F is ten years older than me and makes three times as much money. I'm sure that between her and her husband, they're pulling in over $100K a year. This might not sound like a lot these days, but they live in a small town where the cost of living is pretty good. Anyway, my sister gave me a card with $20 stuck in it and a cheap rattan basket with some bath products in it. At the time I thought it was kind of lame. Please understand, I am NOT a materialistic person. Just hear me out.

About six weeks later was B's birthday. F gave B a card with a check for $25 and a picture frame of a hockey player (you can put a photo -- of a face -- in the player's face so it looks like that person is the hockey player). B is a huge hockey fan and, in fact, is going to start playing on a recreational league this fall. The frame is really cute and is an appropriate gift.

Last week, B and I were running some errands and had to go to the dollar store. Guess what I found there? The exact brand of bath products that F gave me. I had a suspicion about this ever since my birthday. So, there was about five or six dollars worth of stuff that she got for me.

The sticking point in all this is that, besides the fact that F gave me a cheap gift ( I mean, come on! Yes, I enjoy bath products as much as the next person. But they're generally something you give someone who you don't know very well. Or for an office party gift. Or a hostess gift. Or as a "side" gift. NOT the "main" gift!), F gave me a gift that was SO generic. I feel like she doesn't know me at all. Nor does she take the time to find out what my interests are, are there any specific books or movies that I want, or what stores do I like to shop in so she could buy me a gift card. Plus, shoving cash in an envelope requires no thought whatsoever.

I joked with B that she must really rate. Not only did she get a check written out to her (which takes time), but the amount was for more than I got. Plus, her other gift was thoughtful because it reflected one of her interests.

Unlike my gift.

So, please understand that it's not entirely about the money. I can't say that it's not the money at all because F makes a shitload more than I do and can therefore afford more. But, it's more important that she drop $500 a month on the Home Shopping Network where she can get her Susan Lucci nightgown. All true. My main complaint is that the gift she gave me is one she could have given to ANYONE.

I'm mad at myself for being so upset about this. But, I just can't let it go. Ironically, F's birthday was in July. The big 5-0. I gave her a wooden box that I stained and decorated with cruise-themed things because she and her husband love luxury cruises and go on one nearly every year. Plus, B and I got her a gift certificate to HSN. I picked these specific gifts because I wanted to, but also a little bit because I wanted to make a point. Sadly, though, the point was lost on F. Only B and I understood.

There. End of rant.
  • Current Mood
    mellow mellow
Facts of Life


You scored as The Student Dyke. Your entire life is defined by two things: your intellect and your sexuality; moreover you often merge the two to lure in women.


The Student Dyke


The Surprise! Dyke


The Granola Dyke


The Femme Fatale


The Vaginal-Reference-Making Dyke


The Quasi-Gothic Femme


The Sprightly Elfin Femme


The Pretty-Boi Dyke


The Bohemian Dyke


The Stud


The Hipster Dyke


The Magic Earring Ken Dyke


The Little-Boy Dyke


What Type of Lesbian Are You? (Inspired by Curve Mag.)
created with QuizFarm.com
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    amused amused
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Woo hoo!

B got her iBook tonight and I bought the Apple AirPort Express so we can go wireless at home. It was SO easy to set up. In fact, I'm sitting on my butt on the couch right now. And I'm online. I know this is not new for most of you, but it's a hoot for me.
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Awful experience

Last Wednesday, I had an awful experience with my car. I was heading to a doctor's appointment and I was in the center lane of one of the busiest highways here. I felt a "pop" and then a surge in the car, and then it slowly started losing power. I immediately put the flashers on and tried to get over to the right lane so I could get on the shoulder. No one would let me over. My car lost all power and I was still in the center lane. The speed limit is 55 there, but cars go 65 or 70 at least. I started beeping the horn as much as I could. Cars started swerving to get around me. To make a long story short, I was (miraculously) not hit. However, about five or six vehicles, including an 18-wheeler were involved in accidents trying to get around me. No one was hurt, thankfully. One car was smashed in so badly that I'm sure it was totaled. Everyone could walk away from the mess.

Anyhoo, my car was not worth fixing. It was a 1989 Subaru, had no airbags, and started to feel like a deathtrap. I had to basically drain all the money that I was saving for a house in order to pay on a new car. I paid half in cash and financed the rest. The payments will be quite low, so I really can't complain. The car is awesome. It's a 2002 Hyundai Accent and it's wonderful! Wow, only 12 years newer than the Subaru. Ha ha. Low mileage. Loaded. I really lucked out!

I'm still searching for a better job. I'm getting frustrated because I think I've applied for 12 or 13 jobs in the last six weeks and I haven't heard back from anyone! Like everywhere else, the job prospects here suck. But I'm hanging on. I've got to build up my house account again.

Frustrating times, these.
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    calm calm
Jerri Blank

(no subject)

Have you ever..? (Stolen from chordoflife )

1. smoked a cigarette - yes (I was one of those "social smokers")
2. smoked a cigar - no
3. made out with a member of the same sex - oh yeah...as often as possible!
4. crashed a friend's car - no
5. stolen a car - no
6. been in love - yes, and I still am (truly, madly, deeply)
7. been dumped - yes
8. shoplifted- yes
9. been fired - no
10. been in a fist fight - only with a door (the door lost)

11. snuck out of your house - no
12. had feelings for someone who didn't return them - yes
13. been arrested - no
14. made out with a stranger - yes
15. gone on a blind date - yes (ohmygawd)

16. lied to a friend - yes
17. had a crush on a teacher - yes
18. skipped school - yes
19. slept with a co-worker - no, but I did date one
20. seen someone die - yes

21. been on a plane - yes
22. thrown up in a bar - no
23. taken painkillers - yes
24. love someone or miss someone right now - yes
25. laid on your back and watched cloud shapes go by - yes
26. made a snow angel - yes
27. played dress up - yes
28. cheated while playing a game - no
29. been lonely - yes
30. fallen asleep at work/school - yes (every day because I'm so damn bored)

31. used a fake id - no
32. felt an earthquake - yes
33. touched a snake - yes
34. ran a red light - yes
35. been suspended from school - no
36. had detention - no
37. been in a car accident - yes, three
38. hated the way you look - yes
39. witnessed a crime - yes
40. pole danced - no

41. been lost - yes
42. been to the opposite side of the country - yes
43. felt like dying - yes
44. cried yourself to sleep - yes
45. played cops and robbers - no
46. sang karaoke - no (although I might be persuaded to belt out "Delta Dawn")
47. done something you told yourself you wouldn't - yes
48. laughed till some kind of beverage came out of your nose - no
49. caught a snowflake on your tongue - yes
50. kissed in the rain - yes

51. sing in the shower - yes
52. made love in a park - yes
53. had a dream that you married someone - yes
54. glued your hand to something - no
55. got your tongue stuck to a flag pole - no
56. worn the opposite sex's clothes - yes
57. been a cheerleader - no
58. sat on a roof top - yes
59. didn't take a shower for a week - no
60. ever too scared to watch scary movies alone - yes

61. played 'chicken'- no
62. been pushed into a pool with all your clothes on - no
63. been told you're hot by a complete stranger - yes
64. broken a bone - no
65. been easily amused - yes
66. laugh so hard you cry - yes
67. mooned/flashed someone - yes
68. cheated on a test - no
69. forgotten someone's name - yes
70. slept naked - yes

71. gone skinny dipping in a pool - no, lake? no
72. been kicked out of your house - no
73. blacked out from drinking - no
74. played a prank on someone - yes
75. gone to a late night movie - yes
76. made love to anything not human - no
77. failed a class - no
78. choked on something you're not supposed to eat - no
79. played an instrument for more than 10 hours - no
80. cheated on a gf/bf - NO. It was done to me and it's awful. I couldn't do that to someone.

81. felt like killing someone - yes (see #80)
84. thought about running away - yes
85. ran away - maybe soon
86. did drugs - no
87. had detention and did not attend it - no
88. yelled at parents - no
89. made a parent cry - no
90. cried over someone - yes
91. been in a band - yes (high school marching and concert bands)
97. had more than 25 sodas in one day - no
98. broken a cd - yes
99. shot a gun - no
100. visit lj more than 5 times per day- I'm sure I have done this at some point.
  • Current Mood
    accomplished accomplished
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I'm so good at tossing away money

This is the third year in a row that I start out with one day planner system then switch about halfway through the year, This year, I started with the Franklin Covey (two pages per day) planner (which I've used many times before) and now I've switched to the Moleskine Daily calendar (one page per day). Fortunately, I got the Moleskine cheap off eBay since the year is half over. Now, I'm in the process of transferring all of the information to the new calendar. WTF? I'm so good at throwing away money.
Like the eight week yoga class I signed up for. I went once.
Like the year commitment I made to Curves. I went for about four months.
Like all the Buddhist books I bought about five years ago, practiced for a couple years, then gave up on it and sold all the books. Now, I'm practicing again and I had to re-purchase the books.
These are just a few examples. I'm sure a lot of people are like this. But it's so damn frustrating.
And I hate my job and want out. Oh lordy.
But at least I have my new iBook, eh?